In what sounds like the premise for a moderately enjoyable SyFy channel movie, Tennessee police have kindly asked locals to refrain from flushing their drugs down the toilet to prevent “meth-gators.”
That’s right, meth-gators. They’re big, they’re nasty, they… probably aren’t an actual threat.
But we’ll get to that in a minute.
The warning was issued by the Loretto Police Department on Saturday, which explained in a Facebook post how officers executed a search warrant on a home to find the occupant attempting to flush meth and drug paraphernalia down his toilet.
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The suspect was unsuccessful, but officers still used the incident to educate residents on the environmental impact of flushing drugs down the toilet. They wrote:
“Folks … please don’t flush your drugs m’kay … our sewer guys take great pride in releasing water that is cleaner than what is in the creek, but they are not really prepared for meth.”
The post went on to remind locals that plenty of ducks, geese, and other fowl frequent the town’s treatment ponds, and officials “shudder to think what one all hyped up on meth would do.”
While meth-ducks and meth-geese certainly don’t sound pleasant, officers argue there’s an even bigger threat if the meth-polluted water makes its way into Shoal Creek. The post explained:
“Furthermore, if it made it far enough we could create meth-gators in Shoal Creek and the Tennessee River down in North Alabama. They’ve had enough methed up animals the past few weeks without our help. So, if you need to dispose of your drugs just give us a call and we will make sure they are disposed of in the proper way.”
Gulp…
Alligators are terrifying beasts when they’re sober. We can’t even imagine how scary one hopped up on methamphetamine would be!
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Thankfully, meth-gators are probably something we don’t have to worry about, according to alligator expert Kent Vilet, who works in the biology department at the University of Florida.
When asked by NBC News if the reptiles would be affected by meth, he said:
“I would guess they might be affected by it, but they tend to not react to drugs in the same way we do, and I don’t know if it would take a little or a lot to get an alligator to do something on meth.”
Either way, he believes a threat of meth-gators is “a ridiculous notion,” adding:
“If you flush meth, it’s going to be diluted.”
Vilet noted that gators typically do not seek out humans to harm or eat, and many people tend to over-exaggerate their dangers.
That’s not surprising, seeing as most of what we know about gators usually comes from movies like Crawl, which recently hit theaters:
So, yeah, gators don’t really have the best reputation to begin with.
Let’s hope the meth-gators don’t make it worse!
[Image via National Geographic YouTube]